Life is loud, chaotic and outrageous. However, it is fun, carefree and predictable. There are always a lot of wine, many people, a lot of chatter, a lot of late night and early morning. I go out every week. somewhere. everywhere. I know a lot of people, we went to a lot of places. If I want something, I went out and bought it. I used to be young. I have a lot of money and a lot of time wasted. And, although I have everything, I still want more. To be honest, all I have is everything. thing. I value any memory or real experience. I am just doing anything that feels good. I weigh about 70 pounds, have been drunk, careless, and lovelessly. Think of the movie "National Satire" animal house mixed with Coyote Ugly. Yes, that is me. Every other day. Although most people usually wait until the weekend to enjoy their fun, I will use Saturday to light it from Monday to Friday. I will take a break on Sunday, but I will start again the next day. My hangover is not just a night of alcohol fuel. I am a noble person. I am always on the go, almost no slowdown. I have been looking for good times. When I didn't have a good time, I fell from a height to a very tired trough. My conclusion is that this chase is not good for me. In fact, it is safe to say that this is entirely to escape the life I hate. If I want to go home, I will never forget to think about it one day. I remember looking down at my watch while still in the office, logging in online to check the booked flight to leave the town, leaving everything and never looking back. What is stopping me is our son. I love him more than life and definitely have to go home. But I know that I have to pay some price. I know that the only way life is better for me is if I just start to go to someone I should be, instead of continuing to stay away from it and lose myself.
I can't tell exactly where I am fed up. I only remember that one day a fire illuminates me and tells me to lower the volume of my soul because turning over is no longer suitable for me. The man I thought I was going to die, I formally decided to break up together after 19 years. It needs to happen. It either splits or dies. We stopped anything in common. We have been on the verge of inevitability for many years, and we only need to acknowledge it aloud. It took us a few years to lie to our family and friends about the real situation between us, but we know what is going to happen. Spending money, buying things, drinking, gathering and spending anything we can get will only distract us from our dysfunction. It didn't change it. It will only distract us, so we don't have to face reality. This happens in interviews when many of us want to have it. Ignoring the truth does not make it disappear. It just hides it. But this is only part of the problem. The things in my life are always so loud, active and noisy. I am worried about boring but need peace.
After we broke up, I knew that my next step would be difficult to adapt but necessary. Imagine spending 19 years with someone, and then one day, not. In my life, I have to start a new journey, not always including others. Literally. I know I can do it, but I need a starting point. Here's what I did to streamline the process.
- Do things alone - I started to make sure I slept alone. every night. Since 1999, I have not slept alone or have done anything, so this move is very important. I need to do nothing. all! I go out alone every day. I made sure I went to a lot of people. I will hang out or eat alone. I go to the movies and show alone. I have no date. I am sitting alone in the park. I travel alone. Yes, even remote places and cities. I see people. I read what I wrote. I am sure no one knows where I am going. I left. My goal is to learn how to enjoy my company. I quickly got used to it. I don't know why doing things alone is considered abnormal in this era, but I fell in love with it. I also learned that a person who goes out alone is not the same as if he or she is alone or has no friends. This only means that they didn't have an entertainment company or social time at the time. This is perfectly fine for me. Without additional background noise, I feel more likely to try new things. This makes me more focused than ever.
- Eliminate clutter - I cleaned up my house. I peeled the wall. I bought a brand new bed. I took away a lot of old furniture and left the rest in the trash. I took out one of my credit cards from my wallet, called the company, paid the balance, closed the account and cut it off! I took most of my clothes to my mother and nephew and kept about ten pieces of clothes. I have four pairs of shoes and maybe a pair of boots. It may not be the one. I bought it according to the season and there really never been a real season, so I don't know. I have too many things, I am sure I put it around me because I attribute it to it. Most of these projects have little meaning. It blocked my house and left a small space, I was tired of watching it. I even sold my car. What is the use? I live in the city. I share cars or cars like Uber or Lyft everywhere, often not many places. I became very simple. My house is big, but now it's bare, except for books, two sofas, plants, my son's instruments, some laptops and nothing outside the food. I hate clutter and extra. Life without it has become my new normal.
- Get rid of the distraction - I canceled every celebrity [except for the little hands I actually know] and other people who have no close relationship with me on social media. Then I deleted all social media apps. I don't care about keeping up with trends or people I don't know. Many people in my life are my biggest distraction. There is a thing that knows too many people. This is not because they are bad people, but because friendship is based on a beautiful ideal and does not take me anywhere. If there is nothing to go out and talk to gossip and take some selfies on the drinks, we have few words to say to each other. These relationships have become like stocks that need to be sold quickly, as the value has fallen sharply from the initial purchase price. they know. I knew it. The distance is getting bigger and bigger, and as things start to change, we stop talking a few months later. Friendship is wonderful. They can be productive, but they can also be lost. No one likes to lose money. This is to admit that something went wrong or you made a mistake. But reducing your losses can prevent you from devastating falls, which are too steep to recover in the future. Most of us make 3 mistakes in 5 out of 5 times a day. We are still alive to see another day. I still know a lot of people, but I only have a handful of real friends. Believe me, there is a difference. Alcohol is the biggest distraction for me, so I don't drink anymore. I gave up the cold turkey. Alcohol not only keeps me drunk, but also makes me feel obese and sick. dine out. I changed my relationship with food because I don't have much reason to consume too much. Since then, I have lost 70 pounds plus 20 pounds I got, I have never felt better.
We live in an era where social status is a new currency. That's why we take pictures of everything we do and imitate our way of life on social media in a "like me" way. Social media and current culture make our lineage and class now strictly dependent on the level of social participation and acceptance, not how much we give ourselves. In some ways, this has been the case, but it has never been so serious. Now that we have created an environment, we feel that we need to express our wishes in a publicly recorded format to keep pace with our peers, and it has become a trap for the soul. Many of us die of fear of living in an unfiltered lifestyle because it violates social norms and is seen as a risk.
However, it is not our true self, nor what we really want. Believe me, if everyone is as happy as they are, the world will not fall into chaos. We often do our best to hurt each other and always seem to be in a constant cycle of constant confusion. This is why depression is increasing and more and more people are dying of youth. you...
Orignal From: How did I fall in love with my quiet, boring life?
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