Tuesday, April 30, 2019

The pros and cons of cutting your losses and leaving your marriage after the spouse’s business

After learning about the affair, I heard many people are very dissatisfied with their marriage. Few of us think that we will consider ending our marriage one day. But that was before we understood this. And this knowledge can change everything. For many people, an affair is something they can never bear. Still, when you leave the reality of ending marriage, this decision may be much more difficult than you think.

To this end, many people will try to use proven real decision making tools to list the pros and cons. However, when it comes to your own marriage, it is difficult to treat this objectively. So some people have a neutral third-party consultation pros and cons. Some people may ask: "Objectly speaking, what are the pros and cons of staying in marriage after extramarital affairs? To be honest, I always thought that it would be absolutely wise for him to deceive my husband's divorce. But I have never thought that this might happen. This is always a theoretical thing, because we have a wonderful marriage, I never thought that this would be our reality. In this case, I found it difficult to actually end my marriage, I think I should be very very careful Consider this question. So I tried to list the pros and cons in a non-emotional way so that I can make a rational decision. But I am very upset. What are the advantages and disadvantages?"

I can certainly list some of the pros and cons. I may be biased because I finally maintained my marriage. However, I can assure you that I have carefully considered all the shortcomings I have to list. What I experienced is that you can always find the other side of the coin. But in the end, you only need to decide whether it is the biggest pros and cons of your relationship. As you read the list, be aware of any physical sensations or reactions you feel while reading. This will give you clues about your true views and feelings. But remember, your opinions and feelings can and do change during this process. When your things get fresh, your feelings may not be what you feel after six months.

Leave the first number of your marriage after an affair. You don't have to stick to all the hard work: from

 I can't lie. Weeks and months after the event may be afflicted. Pain, confusion and shock always exist. To make matters worse, every time you see your spouse or interact with your spouse, the pain will increase and you will feel and experience it again. Therefore, by repeating the loss relatively early, this iterative process can theoretically be avoided. However, it is unrealistic to not feel painful [or make major adjustments] yourself. This will be an adjustment method. But at least you won't face your spouse every day. At least this is the thinking behind this idea.

Flip the side [and Con] if you don't pass it, then it will follow youfrom

: I understand why it's tempting to just run away - especially if you are sure that you can never continue this thing anyway. However, in a sense, it has not actually escaped. Even if you are absolutely certain that you have not saved your marriage, it makes sense to pass the treatment process anyway, so that you can close the door one day. Because you don't want this baggage to follow you into your next relationship. You should not continue to experience this loss for the rest of your life. No matter how your marriage happens, it's best to do it all at once and move on.

Major 2: Making quick and last breaks for everyone is easier and more friendly. This will reduce confusionfrom

: Some people think that everyone in the family can reduce losses in the first place. They feel that it is useless when the children's hopes are likely to burst in the future. They feel that the certainty of divorce and departure is better than uncertainty or trial, failure, and disappointment for everyone. I understand the idea behind this, but there is always a negative side that guides me to the next point.

If you try and fail, know that you have done everything you can, even if there is uncertainty, there is value.from

: I understand that I don't want to deal with uncertainty, but I think, at least for some people, knowing that they have never tried it is equally bad. At least if you try, you will be able to fall asleep more easily at night, because you know that you pause to evaluate all your choices at least until you pause. Your family will know that you have tried at least. I am not saying that these two options are ideal. I think that only you can decide which choice is best for your particular situation based on your own feelings. Some people know that they can no longer tolerate their cheating spouse for a day. Others are more willing to wait and see what happens.

No one has to struggle or no one is hurt and there is no result. It is painful to stay away from your marriage. But recovery after an affair is also very painful. Neither has worked hard. I think it's important to ask yourself which future situation will make you happier - without your spouse, but know that you don't have to deal with them or the consequences of cheating, or after spending a lot of work with your spouse but know you Overcome the worst situation. Both of these situations will appeal to different people, which is good. There is no right or wrong answer. Only the things that are right for you.




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