One of the biggest challenges in dealing with cross-cultural relationships is to build positive relationships with the extended family. If they are not a very open-minded person, it is not easy for you and it is not easy for them. However, for your partner, it may be important for his family to be able to blend in with you, so appreciate his emotional mood, and if you want your cross-cultural relationship to bloom, pay attention to something.
- The initial hostility did not target you ' you'
First, in cross-cultural relationships, you need to be prepared for some degree of initial hostility or discomfort. This family, especially his/her parents, may have more traditional expectations of his partner. Since you obviously don't fit this bill, you may feel judged and rejected. However, if you can, mature. They won't judge you as an individual, just as a representative of your culture, and you are not what they expect. If you have patience, they may overcome this initial obstacle and begin to appreciate your personality and quality.
- Sensitive to their values and customs
You need to work hard to be sensitive to his/her family values, culture and traditions, even if they are not prepared to do so. Remember that you and your partner have the ability and perspective to choose someone from another culture. They have accepted this choice and may not be as broad as you are. So consider an example if his/her family has a habit of asking for embarrassment in front of the elders and see if you can adopt it with them at the same time. You may even need to wear it in some way. These are all small things that can help you bridge the huge cultural gap. If they find that you are trying to integrate into them and respect their emotions, you may get a lot of respect from the family. Keep in mind that cross-cultural relationships are more demanding and require a better understanding of your partner culture and values.
- He is still by your side
No matter what kind of treatment you receive from your partner's parents and other family members, don't start equating your partner with them. Remember that he/she is not one of them. ' He/She is like you with them, so it is best to let him accept him with confidence and help him overcome this obstacle. This is not easy for him/her, so if you lose his/her frustration, it is unfair, and your cross-cultural relationship will not be good.
- Who are you?
In any relationship, especially in cross-cultural relationships, what you need to accept is that no matter how hard you try, if they are not willing to move forward, you will never get the respect of his/her family. So don't bend back and try to please them. If you are very uncomfortable while participating in a custom or acting in some way, please do not push it into it. The first person you should talk to is your partner. Communicate your feelings, if you are too shy or embarrassed about his/her family, let him/her do it on your behalf. Finally, they must learn to transcend their differences and respect yourself. If this does not happen, please don't be completely frustrated. You may still get support from your partner, which is actually everything you need to work in an intercultural relationship.
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Orignal From: Cross-cultural relationship - 4 tips for family integration
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